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 Post Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 5:53 pm 
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Amazing Looney
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Posts: 1471
Location: Minneapolis...home of the Lutheran Polka Eucharist. Lift your accordian unto the Lord.
*click*
Vic: Monsterous...I mean, dearest. If we're in the telly and I press the remote, won't the room outside change?
Enid: Hmmm. Hadn't thought of that. Are you suggesting that we can change reality without from within this one?
Vic: Considering that this one isn't real and the one outside has that in common with it...yes. I think.
Enit: Tea?
Vic: Quite. I mean, if we completely change the outside world, won't we run the risk of not being able to change it all back?
Enid: There might be consequences...like arms growing out of ears. That sorta thing.
Vic: Ew.
Enid: Yet, when you consider our disgusting living conditions, I think it'd might just be worth it.
Vic: Beats sharing the bed with all those sheep.
Enid: If only you really meant that.

Voiceover: Will Vic press the button of life changing risk and give up farm animals forever or will Enid come up with yet another amazing observation based in speculative analysis just to vex Vic? Stay tuned!
Vic: Bloody 'ell.
*click*

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 Post Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 2:15 am 
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Meh
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Posts: 1893
Location: in an english country garden.
Enit: Ooooh, i do hate cliffhangers.
Store Salesman: well are you just going to sit there all day watching it or do you want the TV?
Enit: Does it come with an aerial?
Store Salesman: *sigh* Yes madam, as i told your husband barely a month ago, you can see from behind there is one already plugged in.
Customer: But, that's just a Norwegian Morris Dancer with his finger jammed into the socket.
Store Saleman: Marvelous reception though.
Enit: ...I'll take it.

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 Post Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:32 pm 
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Amazing Looney
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Location: Minneapolis...home of the Lutheran Polka Eucharist. Lift your accordian unto the Lord.
Morris dancer: I become obsolete in less than 2 years.
Enit: Digital, eh? Oow! Aren't we all 'igh an' mighty!
Morris: No, no. I'm leaving for Canada.
Enit: Oh. I see. I'll just come with you, then.
Morris: It's not allowed.
Enit: By 'oo?
Morris: The Albion Survivors Handbook. It knows everything.
Enit: I've never heard of such a book.
Morris: It's like the Mormon Bible. Lots of information from unproven sources. Religion from a hat, you might say.
Enit: You mean like, L. Ron Hubbard?
Morris: A man so amazing, he still writes from the grave? No.
Enit: (looks around, whispers) You want to come back to my place?
Morris: Depends. Is Vic there?
*click*
Vic: Turn that back on! He said my name!
Enid: Like you're the only Vic that's appeared in this bloody thread! What egomaniacal rubbish!
Vic: (to you, dearest reader) Actually, I think I am the only Vic. I wish there were others. Que sera, eh?
Enid: 'Oo are you talking to?
Vic: Bloody 'ell.
*click*

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 Post Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 3:04 pm 
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Meh
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Posts: 1893
Location: in an english country garden.
*click*

voiceover: last time on Star Trek Voyager

Seven Of Nine: You will all be assilimated, resistance is futile.
Neelix: Well I'd love to assimilate with you, heheheh.
Seven Of Nine: That is illogical, i cannot assimilate with species 218, and so it is irrelevant.
Neelix: *ahem* Well As morale officer I need to keep my crew members happy.
Kes: Neelix!!!
Neelix: I'm sorry my dear, but remember that since the captain found out you were only one years old during our illicit relationship she had me confined to sickbay, but I'm making excellent progress.
The Doctor: Yes quite. Kes bring me 5mg of the Neural Suppressor in hypospray form, it's time for Neelix's hourly dose.
Kes: Yes Doctor.

beep beep
Captain Janeway: Seven, meet me in my quarters in 5 minutes to discuss our next...borg encounter, and don't tell Chakotay.
Seven Of Nine: Yes Captain (gives a naughty smile). If you'll excuse me everyone.
The Doctor: Out of the mouths of babes. Well what do i have to offer anyway?, i'm just a hologram after all (slightly jealous)

beep beep
Captain Janeway: Chakotay, is there any chance of getting us out of the Delta Quadrant yet?
Chakotoy: Maybe so captain...B'Elanna, have you finished upgrading the warp plasma coil yet?
B'Elanna: Not yet, it'll take around 3 more minutes until it goes online.
Chakotay: Give her 7 more years captain and we'll be ready.
Captain Janeway: Noted...Tuvok?, is that an extra arm growing out of that vulcan ear of yours or are you just pleased to see me?
Tuvok: Indeed, but insults will get you nowhere. however...
Captain Janeway: Spare me the details I have a date with Seven. Tom? Be ready to take us out of here.
Tom Paris: Yes Ma'am.
Captain Janeway: Harry? Hop on one leg and keep reciting the alphabet backwards until I return.
Harry Kim: Erm, yes ma'am.
Captain Janeway: I love the delta quadrant.

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Last edited by Mr Gotobed on Thu Jan 10, 2008 7:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:58 pm 
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Amazing Looney
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Joined: Sun Jun 17, 2007 6:55 pm
Posts: 1471
Location: Minneapolis...home of the Lutheran Polka Eucharist. Lift your accordian unto the Lord.
*click*
Vic: I love a good parody.
Enid: Lust after 7, more like it. (flips rat in pan)
Vic: Oh, please. She's not my type at all.
Enid: If she were a certain holographic bald headed doctor...
Vic: I'm bi-curious, is all!
Enid: Call it what you will. Women don't appeal to you. Little boys do. You're just curious, without the "bi"!
Vic: Yet, still not Gay!
Enid: You should be a Vicar! Or, a Politician!
Vic: Hmm. I should get chummy with The Pope before the next castle blows up.
Enid: If by "chummy", you mean a furious rubbing of parts...
Vic: I never!
*click*

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 Post Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 7:33 pm 
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Meh
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Location: in an english country garden.
Chakotay: Chakotay to the doctor, we've beamed Captain Janeway directly to sickbay. it appears she has a nanoprobe lodged up...
The Doctor: I'm well aware of the facts Commander, what i need to know is how it got there.
Seven Of Nine: That is irrelevant. The captain was merely showing me the schematics of the Alpha Quadrant, then somehow this happened.
Neelix: You mean she was showing you the schematics of her Alpha Quadrant.
Seven Of Nine: Neelix, You will be assim...
The Doctor: Oh shut up Seven. Kes?, find me the holoscoop and a very large torch. I'm going in.
Kes: But doctor, couldn't you just simply use the medical tricorder to remove it?
The Doctor: Maybe, but you'll understand why i'm preferring this option if you were confined to sickbay for so long.

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 Post Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 7:48 pm 
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Amazing Looney
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Location: Minneapolis...home of the Lutheran Polka Eucharist. Lift your accordian unto the Lord.
Enid: When did this show become XXX?
Vic: Silence! It's em...educational!

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 Post Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 8:16 pm 
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Meh
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Location: in an english country garden.
Enid: you also said that about Smut Trek The Next Adulteration which was on a few pages back.
Enit: Well I liked it.
Enid: How the bleeding 'ell did you get in here???
Enit: My Vic clicked the transport button on his remote just because I wanted to watch Desperate Fishwives, and here I am.
Enid: Well I suppose at least your Vic isn't so smutty.
Vic: Well at least Enit is.
Enid: Right that's it I've had enough. I'm clicking myself out of your TV set to be with your Vic. I hope you and my Vic are very happy together.
*click*

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 Post Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 12:46 pm 
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Amazing Looney
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Location: Minneapolis...home of the Lutheran Polka Eucharist. Lift your accordian unto the Lord.
Vic: Well now. That was confusing.
Vic: Shut up and strip!
Vic: Right-o.

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 Post Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 12:55 pm 
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Meh
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Location: in an english country garden.
Enid: Oh silly me, i must've clicked the button twice. I'm on the outside and they're all in there....Oh sh*t the telly just blew up.

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 Post Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 7:55 pm 
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Amazing Looney
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Location: Minneapolis...home of the Lutheran Polka Eucharist. Lift your accordian unto the Lord.
-moments before-
*Ka-Bloom!*
Vic1: *cough cough* This isn't right.
Vic2: No. Not at all.
Vic3: I was about to say.
Vic4: About to say, what?
Vic5: It's a figure of speech.
Vic6: Like, going out on a limb?
Vic7: I've done that. Saved a kitty.
Vic8: That would be literal.
Vic9: All cats are literal.
Vic10: There's an awful lot of Vics in here.
Vic4: I was about to...nevermind.
Vic7: Nevermind, what?
Vic1: What about fictional cats?
Vic8: True. They're figurative by nature.
Vic3: Is nature figurative?
Vic2: Bloody 'ell.
*click*

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 Post Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 8:58 pm 
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Meh
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Location: in an english country garden.
Seven Of Nine: Seven to the bridge. Captain, there seems to be a temporal parallel space/time paradox fluctuating from within my sensor array.
Captain Janeway: You mean you need another borg encounter Seven?, meet me in my quarters in 15 minutes.
Seven Of Nine: You misunderstand Captain although I shall comply, but later. Right now I'm picking up ten faint lifesign readings surrounding this vessel.
Harry Kim: U-T-S-R-Q-P...I'm picking up something too Captain.
Captain Janeway: Raise shields and go to red alert. On-Screen.
Tuvok: Fascinating. It appears that the electrical energy surrounding Voyager is of humanoid origin, and i must add of low intelligence.
Harry Kim: I-H-G-F...Captain: I'm picking up a micro wormhole unlike one we've ever encountered before which has suddenly appeared approximately 13,000km away. The energy came directly from within.
Captain Janeway: Thank you Mr Kim. By the way, you can now stop hopping on one leg and reciting the alphabet backwards.
Harry Kim: Phew, understood.
Tuvok: Captain, it also appears the energy readings resembles similarly to our own whilst in mid-transportation to and from Voyager.
Harry Kim: The micro wormhole has just collapsed Captain.
Captain Janeway: Understood. Captain to transporter room, get a lock on the lifesigns around this ship and beam them directly to the brig, then immediately raise a level 10 forcefield around them. Tuvok, Chakotay, Seven you're with me.

moments later, in the brig...
Vic2: Right, which one of you clicked the Interactive button on the remote?
Vic1-10 (excluding 2): Wasn't me (or me) me neither, etc etc...

meanwhile back in the living room inside the first tv set, seconds before the wormhole collapsing...
Enit: Oh bother, this remote is far too complicated for my parrot brain. i'm pulling the plug on the TV before I inadvertently cause anymore damage.
*unclick*

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